Leap

I've never been in this position before. I have never wanted to forget about someone so badly, but at the same time all I want is to be in their life. And that's the best I can do at explaining how I feel right now. I can't really breathe and it feels like I've been stabbed in the back but worse. It's weird how much you don't know how much someone means to you until they take a step out of your life. And then it hits you like a punch to the face...and your left standing there trying to figure out what to do. I mean...am I suppose to forget about you? Yes?...How? How am I suppose to forget about you? You changed my life, I can't forget about you, it's impossible. Maybe I'm not suppose to forget about you...maybe just get over you? How?...How am I suppose to get over someone like you. Just when I think I can do it something happens and I have to start all over again. It's like walking up a mountain..finally making it to the top and then getting shoved off. It's really hard to get to the top of mountain when I keep getting pushed off. It's even harder when all I want to do is stay at the bottom and be with you. That's all I want. I never thought I would be in this position...but here I am, it feels like I'm choking and all I'm doing is typing and thinking about you and it takes my breath away, in a bad way. If this is how I get when you've only taken a step out of my life then what's going to happen to me when you take a whole leap out of my life?

I was fine before you jumped back into it. I hate you for jumping in and out of my life, it was much easier with you out of it the first time. What your doing to me is like letting a toddler lick a lollipop and then throwing it away. It leaves them frustrated, sad, and confused. That's what you're doing to me...leaving me sad, frustrated, and confused.